AFC Open Mic Night - Creative Event

For my second creative event, I went to the Auburn Christian Fellowship’s Open Mic Night on April 19. Again, I wasn’t inspired in the way that I am often inspired by good music or visually engaging artwork, but I was inspired for writing nonetheless. When I got to ACF, the first acts had already started and the whole close-knit community of ACF was there, along with many others. The small building was packed out with people sitting all over the place, on couches and chairs and standing in the back. I found some people I knew then started paying attention to the young girl on the piano performing through the loud, incessant talking and laughing drowning her out. It also didn’t help that she was very timid and was barely singing into the microphone, and when she was, it was impossible to make out the actual words, if it truly was words she was attempting. During her set, and many other times throughout the night, the super supportive people would share a collective “shh!” and things would quite down, though usually it lasted less than a minute. Regardless of who was paying attention or how many times the performer made a mistake, the applause when the set was over would be unanimous and excited, forcing a smile on the nervous person leaving the stage.

One performance that was especially eye opening was when two young men wearing bandanas performed a rap in which it was completely impossible to understand a word. They fumbled over their obviously unpracticed lines and were rarely in synch with the beat the entire song. The crowd, however, was on their feet and laughing and clapping with the beat, encouraging them with yells of approval. When it was finally over, the two guys left the stage beaming and I had to wait my turn to talk to them because so many people got to them first and told them how amazing they were. The performers actually smiled and took the compliments like they deserved them.

I realized that the whole night had very little to do with art or performance and a lot to do with community. No one cared about someone actually being able to sing or do magic or tell a funny joke, they were just proud of their friends for getting on the stage. I’m sure I’ll be able to use that theme in a story at some point and I was glad I went; It was a refreshing way to look at the arts. I learned that they didn’t have to be taken so seriously and that art is even more diverse than I thought it was. It can be used as a tool to simply bring people together.

Creative Event – Greek Sing 2013

I attended Greek Sing at the Auburn Arena on April 11, 2013. Greek Sing is an event put on by the Auburn University sororities in which they compete in a choreographed dances to mashups of music. Each sorority has a different theme and different music to fit the theme and they are rated by a panel of judges for one winner.

I’m working on a story right now to be written from a woman’s perspective and so lately I’ve been even more conscious than usual about women and how they act around and interact with different people groups.

Most of the dances sucked. I grew up with five sisters and they all danced in upper level competitive ballet and modern dance. One of my best friends danced professionally for the Atlanta Ballet for a couple years, and I even danced myself for a local dance company that needed an extra guy for a project. From what I inferred, it was a bunch of girls that might have danced a little in high school or just “wanted to give it a try” for the first time in college and it was obvious that they had been drinking too much beer and hadn’t been stretching. That being said, it made the impressive and creative routines that much more enjoyable, though they were few and far between.

I wasn’t surprised when my inspiration didn’t come from the movement of the dancers or thought provoking choreography. But each dance was introduced by a short video explaining why they chose their certain theme and what it meant to them as a group. In those interviews, the way that the speaker in the video carried herself was very interesting and telling of different female personalities. It was very obvious which groups just had a lot of fun with their dance and which ones took it seriously and wanted it to be perfect. Then my favorite were the ones that tried to pretend they just wanted to have a lot of fun but were obviously very serious about the whole thing.

I tended to like the groups that took it seriously, and it showed in their dance. One in particular that intrigued and impressed me was the “Nightmare on DG Street” themed dance. While most of the ones leading up to it were themes like “High School” or “Candy” or “Pirates” Delta Gamma came out with a very dark and scary dance with fierce movements and sometimes even ominous music. It wasn’t the most impressive dancing of the night, but I was impressed by their bold theme choice.

Overall I learned a little more about the competitive side of women and how passive it can be. Chi Omega won the competition but in my opinion Alpha Gamma Delta was far more impressive.

"Big Blue Eyes" by Morgan Shaffer

Morgan Shaffer’s story “Big Blue Eyes” was interesting and slightly disturbing. I had not known about the news story of Casey Anthony, so I was confused at parts. Having read it without knowing the story, it seemed that the daughter in question was still alive and just in the other room playing house and the “crime” that kept getting mentioned was unclear. If Anthony was convicted of a crime, then why was she not in custody? And if she wasn’t convicted then why does the interviewer keep referring to it as a crime?

I liked the set up of the story and even not knowing the story it stood alone well as a completely different story where a mother loses her child for a month somehow and is an all around horrible person.

Having now read the original news story, I think it would be beneficial to change the name of Anthony and then make the story very obvious as to what it is about. A fictionalized story about a woman who kills he child then gets away without despite insurmountable evidence would be a great read. I didn’t know that T.C. Boyle’s story was a fictionalized news story until after I had read it, and standing alone and having not known that news story either, it was still a great story and an interesting read.

One more thing for improvement would be to include more characters. By developing just one more person, like the grandmother or the boyfriend, Shaffer could take control of the story by fictionalizing that character far more than she would have been able to fictionalize Casey. Another character and more story dynamics would help the story be more rounded off and full, instead of feeling like it is just a different approach to the same news story.

"Driver's License" by Sky Acton

Sky Acton’s story “Driver’s License” has room for improvement. I liked the complex idea that Acton tried to get across on the page but I think that she assumed that the reader knew more that he or she did. I would gravitate to the side of trusting the reader usually, but in a story so bizarre I think it would help to know more about sex changes and transvestites and to go about the story in a more educational, informative way.

Foreshadowing in the paper was too strong at times. On Page 3 Anthony is saying goodnight to his daughter he said, “And the door clicked shut and hid away my remainder of what would soon be my past.” Letting the reader know that a change will occur later is far less enjoyable for the reader than to just experience the change for himself or herself. Foreshadowing can be used to allude to more specific details or something small that is going to happen, but to dramatically imply the rest of the story in one sentence is frustrating to the reader and poor form.

Another cop out to avoid would be having Anthony describe himself in the mirror. Granted, it’s hard to have a character describe themselves in the first person but in my opinion it is far worse to just have the character stare at themselves and talk about what they see. If the character has a defining feature, you could bring that up in the story – I liked what you did with the driver’s license, very sneaky – or you could have other characters comment on it or have the character in question simply talk realistically about something they like or hate about their appearance.

If this story is moved around a bit for clarification I think it could be even more interesting than it already is.

"Stutter" by Taylor Siebert

Taylor Siebert’s story “Stutter” was very interesting and creative. The characters were well thought out and known thoroughly by Siebert which made them come across on the page almost flawlessly. The story had a good balance of pushing the envelope of what is possible in fiction while still keeping the story grounded in reality.

I didn’t understand the importance of the blonde girl and Levi. She is never mentioned again and it seems to be little more than a message against racism that doesn’t add to the story.

The stuttering, which is the name of the story and carries a great importance throughout the descriptions, doesn’t seem to carry much weight once Roman starts talking. Besides in summary, he is never faced with a awkward or difficult situation in the present because of his stuttering and seems to just enjoy being quiet but then talk nearly flawlessly when he wants to.

For the POV shift, I really liked the idea of three different points of view telling the same story and I think I’m going to do that in my next story. If Siebert wants to do that in this story I think it needs to be done more blatant and obviously because where it stands now it looks like it was almost an accident. Also with the three points of view the blonde girl could stay because maybe that part of the story was important to Levi while Roman and Sawyer wouldn’t have that in their versions at all.

The ending didn’t work in my opinion. Everything happened too fast and without enough emotion involved. Levi needs to have just learned of something that may kill him or have some kind of threat other than the fact that he just thinks he is dying. And if Levi is Roman’s only friend I think he needs to be more affected by the fact that Levi is dying.

"Smoke Rings" by Caroline Barr

Caroline Barr’s story, “Smoke Rings” was well written and contained the necessary elements of story and plot. It began with a girl that was unsure about a lot of things and trying to figure out her place and what she was going to do at college. When she was entranced by the mysterious smoking girl in her sorority she never thought that she would have a chance to meet her and just kept her distance in admiration. When she got stuck in a bathroom with her and they were both forced to learn a little be it about each other, the result was an interesting dynamic.

Clara, the mysterious smoking girl, was a great character but I think she could have been rounded off a little more. I always think characters can have more rounding off because in real life people are constantly surprising me and making me hit myself for making them so simple in my head. Just a couple instances of Clara doing something out of character, like wearing a sorority shirt or looking like she’s enjoying something that her character typically wouldn’t enjoy. I mean she did willfully enter the sorority and someone has to pay a lot of money to stay there so she can’t be completely miserable.

The change in the narrator was good but I think it came before it was encouraged by Clara. By the time they were in the bathroom the narrator had already stolen the glass coaster. Why did the narrator suddenly decide to change her life and be a thief? It would make more sense if she was encouraged and inspired by Clara and did something like that afterward, but before seems slightly forced for the stories sake.

I liked the flower, and I didn’t say this in class but maybe Clara draws a flower but then the narrator comes back and draws a different, more badass mark next to it to outdo Clara.

Analysis of "Emergency" and "Escort"

Voice was very apparent in Denis Johnson’s story “Emergency” and Chuck Palahniuk’s story “Escort.” Though both stories were very short, they captured and took on their weight and presence through the use of well-established voices. Both Johnson and Palahniuk were established writers when they published these stories and had spent a long time developing and sharpening their voices in order to produce such potent short stories.

In Johnson’s story, the voice came through in the strange and overt dialogue. An example is when Georgie takes the knife out of the patient’s eye: “‘Where,’ the doctor finally asked, ‘did you get that?’ Nobody said one thing more, not for quite a long time. But after a while, one of the ICU nurses said, ‘Your shoelace is untied.’ Georgie laid the knife on a chart and bent down to fix his shoe.” The scene that Johnson created was very much done through his use of voice and the way that he presented the scene without any gaps but still created something interesting and memorable.

Voice also came though in Johnson’s story in his characters. He made people in his story act in ways that came as a sort of slight shock but not so much that they seemed unbelievable. The voice carried the story past any ideas or worries about inconsistency and I was left completely believing that the characters existed somewhere in the world.

Palahniuk’s story was not driven with dialogue but instead with an insane amount of knowledge and detail about an interesting and obscure scenario. Palahniuk is known for his absurd stories and I think one of the main reasons that they are so successful is because he spends the majority of his time on a story doing research and experimenting and investigating the topics very thoroughly before he writes. Another thing Palahniuk succeeded in with driving the story was making the character do weird things. He goes to church with someone he doesn’t really know then actually takes a note off the little tree and actually does what it says and that is what makes it a story. One of my biggest pet peeves is when everyone gets so set on why. If we knew all the why’s of any given story it would fail to be a story anymore. “Why?” is a valid question but should not be investigated too hard, it should be skimmed like the extra foam off of a class of beer then forgotten about as the reader lets the story quench their thirst. Palahniuk does that well by giving just enough information: “I was desperate enough to go.” But doesn’t give the reader too much and lets them fill in the blanks themselves.

For both of the writers, confidence is what voice is boiled down and refined to. A voice comes from knowing a story or a character or a place so well that it creates itself. If a writer finds out about a story as they write it, great things can come about, but often the voice can waver and there will be a lot of editing. Voice also knows when to break rules and when to follow them, all of it being rooted in knowing the story so well that no one could find fault in it.